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God, I LIVE for THIS SHIT!!! Amy Winehouse’s life just continues to get better and better so leave it to Blaaaake Fielder-Civil (Amy’s estranged hubby) to have a bay-bay with that hid of a creature above! While preparing his divorce case against his once beloved Wino…this douche had time to fuck the pants off that creature and oopppps! BABY alert.

The woman, Gillenn, claims that she did the no-no dance with Blake in rehab and is now six weeks pregnant.  What the fuck is up with people getting preggers during detox? Can you believe I actually have local stories about that in my home town? Oh yeah, she also likes to needle herself in the arm because bitch is a heroin addict.

I can’t wait to see what a fuckery of a baby this is! Could you imagine what that little demon is going to look like? He’s going to pop out with his own supply of needles, heroin, and a fucking life time’s supply of Jack Daniels.

-C

NEWSOFTHEWORLD

Blake Fielder Civil ain’t got no mon-ay in the bank especially since he doesn’t want his prime piece and my baby girl, Amy Winehouse, back.  He does, however, want baby’s money.  Nobody puts baby in the corner…and takes money from her, only drugs.

According to Wino’s papa, Blaaaake is trying to cop almost $7 million out of Amy! Papa Wino says:

“Amy’s a musical talent, but since she’s been with Blake she’s barely been able to perform on stage, let alone make a record.”

He’s also quite worried about Amy’s desire to return to the drug fueled romance she once shared with her hubby Blakieee saying his daughter is “guilty of loving [Blake].”

“I’m not saying she is going back to him, she just wants to talk. But I want her to get divorced. I want Blake and his family out of our lives… She nearly ended up dead thanks to him,” Mitch expressed.

Bitch is dickmatized.  Methinks Blakey’s so backed up with coke that when he goes HEYYY OOOH (you know what I’m referencing) he releases like two quarts of fresh blow, ready and cut, waiting to be served.  That’s Amy’s signal to remove mouth and wait to catch it.

-C

Source

Blake was really aiming high from Winehouse huh? a girl who can both smile and grab her rack for the camera! Anyway, Blake’s seeing the above broad who is a 17-year-old school girl named Francesca Morralee.  During his time in the chokey, 26-year-old Blaaake sent and received love letters from this bitch along with emotional phone calls.

She’s apparently told friends she’s “in love” with Amy’s old main man.  When Blake was released from jail last week, the underaged idiot hid in the back of his mom’s car waiting for him.  She also hasn’t been back to school since he was released.

And since she’s an idiot and well, a child, she took to her Facebook and bragged about her relationship even showcasing that poor excuse of a gift that Blake gave to her (see balloon in second picture.)

She apparently added messages saying she couldn’t wait until he was released and how she had spent the “best day with him.” A friend claims:

“They are trying to keep the whole thing under wraps. It’s been going on since him and Amy separated. He filed for divorce and only then did he ask her out officially.They tell each other that they love each other. They seem so happy together he is absolutely devoted to her even though it is early days. He has promised her he wants nothing to do with Amy. Blake is in rehab now but when he gets out they want to live together.”

Amy apparently ran back to London upon hearing of Blake’s release to try and patch things up, but it’s been said that Blake won’t return any of her phone calls.  My poor baby girl! At least she got coke filled hearts for Valentine’s Day :(

-C

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I haven’t written about my beloved baby girl Amy Winehouse in such a long time! I should probably also tell you that her once beloved Blaaaake incarcerated, was released from jail on Wednesday thus triggering romantic thoughts in Amy’s head.  So much so that Amy realized how much she still really loves him and is determined to win Blaaaake back.

Aka she misses the drugs.  After a long ridiculous shack up in St.Lucia, Crackie has decided to return to London to ‘win’ back her man.  One of Wino’s apparent ‘friends’ told The Sun:

“Hearing Blake was out brought lots of emotions back for Amy. She feels like she was the last to know he was getting released and that hurt. She is desperate to see him again and wants to work things out. She still loves him.”

Well, let’s hope Wino is prepared to fight to the death for her man.  According to the Blakester, he has no want to rekindle his and Amy’s romance.  Upon his prison release, he told reporters that he is still jumping ship by going ahead with the divorce saying:

“It’s all going ahead — but I don’t really know what will happen. It’s just nice to be on the outside again. Now I am going to get over my drug habit.”

I just laughed, peed a little, laughed again, and just had a craving for some pot brownies.

-C

Source: TheSun

My baby girl Amy Winehouse is totally going to get fucked over.  Unfortch for my babes, her soon-to-be ex-husband, Blaaaaake Fielder Civil, isn’t getting divorced quietly.  In fact, he’s taking this shit way serious.  Probably because millions of her fortune can be his…what a mo.

According to new reports, he and his lawyers are getting together a list of Amy’s bad ass behavior and even having the guys she messed around with while Blake was in jail to get in on the action.

An insider says:

“He wants to put together a case arguing that Amy is ultimately responsible for the breakdown in their marriage. Blake is totally serious about this. He’s hired a top lawyer and is compiling a file of Amy’s errors throughout their short marriage, he’s even decided to contact the men Amy’s meant to have slept with. Blake wants them to testify to prove that Amy was unfaithful during their marriage.”

Kids this is why you stay away from the crack.  You get doped up and you marry a dirtier douche than yourself.  Eh I guess her vagine could have gave him the herps from sleeping around, but I’m sure all of the butt touching in jail doesn’t leave him far behind in the disease department.

-C

Why watch Days of Our Lives when you have a living and breathing soap opera living amongst us? My baby girl Amy Winehouse may have screwed herself over to old love letters she wrote to Blakkiiieeee Incarcerated.  Since Amy has been publicly bashing herr soon to be ex hubby, Blake Fielder Civil, it seems as though his mothaaa has become quite angry.  

To get her soon-to-be ex daughter-in-law back, Mama Fielder Civil went to the UK’s News of the World and showed them an Amy-penned love letter that is now in the hands of Blaaaaake’s attorneys.  Unfortunately for her, the things written in that letter may cost her millions.  It’s apparently ‘widely accepted’ that Winehouse’s Grammy award winning album Back to Black was based on her agonies with the Blaaake relationship. 

Also in the letter, Amy offers to write an album of new songs strictly for Blake.  “So I’m thinking how about I WRITE you a few albums instead,” gushed Ames.  So naturally, Blake’s lawyers are going to argue that if it wasn’t for Blake, her CD wouldn’t have been as successful.  Blake served an instrumental part in the creative process turned success.

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Oh the good ol days.  Our little Winehouse with her crackie enable, Blaaaake Fielder-Civil.  Since I will never get enough of my Wino, I will always post about her.  The Sun sent one of their reporters over to St. Lucia to check up with our little one.  The reporter learned, aside from Wino stealing drinks and terrorizing guests, that although Blaaake wants to divorce Wino, she ain’t having it.

Wino said:

“I still love my Blake. I won’t let him divorce me. He’s still in jail but the moment he comes out I’ll be there waiting for him. I love him because he’s just like me. Blake is the male version of me. We’re perfect for each other. I don’t want to go back home to England. I want to wait for Blake here.”

I don’t want England wants her to come back home either.  Their streets have turned into a crackie dust pile and all of the booze from the pubs are missing.  And what the fuck is our little Crackie of Camden talking about? Her vagine has been like an all you can eat buffet while on vacation.  Perhaps my favorite little tidbit in this article has to do with Amy trying to get it on with a couple.  Stupid couple denied! I’d force my boyfriend to at least let her drop her panties and take pictures of the crackie dust falling out.  It’d be well worth it.  The guy said:

“As soon as we arrived at the resort Amy was all over my girlfriend. She was telling her, ‘You’re gorgeous. I’d love to fuck you. Bring your boyfriend, he can watch’. She was quite clear what she wanted, she was saying, ‘You two can spend the night in my room’. If she had been at all good looking we might have done it. But we just ended up smoking a sneaky joint with her instead.”

Alright.  You won’t let her touch the peen and vagine, but you will allow joint sharing? That’s instant herps!

I forgot to tell you guys.  I don’t just have one Wino story today, I have two! Wino’s pop, Mitch Wino, is like the UK version of Michael Loh an.  They bank off of talking about their kid’s issues.  He claims, despite reports of island flings and bar bans, that Amy is 100% clean in St. Lucia and said she was only acting weird because:

“she was just having fun, pretending to be a horse.”

Pretending to be a horse? What and what? If anything, I’d go for acting like Mr. Kotter because that curly fuck of hair on top of her head is some 70s shit. 

He continues:

“Stories about my troubled daughter are selling newspapers and magazines. They don’t want her to get better. But she is better. They didn’t see her lying in bed for days in a dark room. She was close to death twice. We have been working a lot to get her to where she is right now.”

And surprise, surprise according to Hello! magazine, our little Wino has a new album in the works plus a documentary that TV journalist Daphne Barak has been gathering shit for.  You may find it a lot like Miss Britney’s shit from back in November.  Ironically, the documentary is being called, If U Seek Amy, Saving Amy.  The interviews with her family will reveal how her bizarre and ridic behavior affects everyone. Oh really? Because we couldn’t just get all of this from pictures?

Class and Trash with an Edge of sASS*-Cw

These UK publications are like fucking superheroes.  They jump on the news like white on rice.  They’ll even fly to St. Lucia to catch up with Winehouse! I’m so jealous! So it’s no surprise that A News of the Worldreporter flew all the way to where Amy’s been shacked up vacationing.  An expected booze filled, drug induced, skanky Wino is what I would expect if my ass flew all of the way over.  Instead it was the opposite! Refund!

The reporter apparently found a love struck and “allegedly” drug free Wino.  During a long chat with the reporter, Amy exclaimed:

“I’ve finally escaped from hell. I’m in love again and I don’t need drugs. Look at me, I’m glowing!”

That’s not her glowing.  That’s the crack residue leaking through her pores from the previous months and years of usage.  Come on!  As previously dished, her new man is Josh Bowman.  He’s apparently ritzy, uptown, and fancy.  She met this bitch at the resort she is currently terrorizing.  He’s there with Grandma and I’m sure she really approves of this disaster!

And apparently hiding her lust for Josh isn’t a problem.  The reporter explains that:

“…she’s totally unabashed as everyone watches her drag him into the bushes.”

So what about BLAAAAAAKE?!?! Apparently Josh has opened her eyes to seeing what Blake really is…to her a drug addicted douche, to me a loyal and lovely soul.  Wino said: 

“He (Josh) couldn’t be more different from my husband, which is not a bad thing. Blake looks like me, a right mess. But Josh is all handsome and clean and that’s what I love about him… I’m just here on my own, happy and having a good time with Josh. I’ll deal with Blake when I get back. But our whole marriage was based on doing drugs.”

She also contradicts earlier reports claiming she had a wonderful sex life with Blake.  She now insists and slams her hubby by claiming he was ‘rubbish in bed’.  Look at our mouthy Wino! She’s actually forming sentences!

She also goes on to admit she knew her drug problem was leading her on a path to the undertaker:

“Before I came out here I looked at a photo of myself in the newspaper and was horrified. My skin was a spotty mess and I was so pale and skinny. I thought to myself, ‘Girl, you got to sort yourself out or you’ll be dead soon.’ I was depressed, doing drugs and had no life in me at all. Coming here has changed everything. We’re having a great time together along with all Josh’s family and friends and I just don’t want the holiday to end.”

The holiday’s been over since fucking January 1st.  It’s now January 12th.  Oh my little Wino, you’re so crazy!

And just when she started shit talking Blake, Blaaaake has become a bad ass and filed for divorce from the singer.  Unfortch for our wino, they do NOT have a pre-nup.  Blaaaake’s laughing straight to the bank with this! She’s also cheated on his ass one time officially, although we also know more relationships existed.  He’s going after the money!

Blake Incarcerated’s lawyer, Henri Brandman, says that Blaaaaaaaake had instructed him to launch the divorce action on the grounds of Amy’s adultery.  FIIIIIIIGHT!

Class and Trash with an Edge of sASS*-Cw