Apr
14
2009
Angela Jacobsen’s a smart bitch because she probably got paid a nice $um for dishing the details on Australian television. In an interview with the once nanny, Jacobsen appears to have no negative feelings towards the material mom. She describes Madonna as a “loving caring” mother who “spent lots of time with the children.”
When it comes to the rejection of M’s adoption bid for Mercy James, the former nanny is disappointed in the court’s decision:
“It’s a shame. It would’ve been a great opportunity for the little girl… She would have been well looked after in a loving family.”
She also shot down rumors of Madonna giving her the boot asap and explains that she was let go from her duties as David’s nanny due to the kid now attending a French preschool which requires him a nanny fluent in French. Says Jacobsen:
“I was learning basics with David, but he progressed far quicker than I did and I’m not able to help with homework and things like that.”
She also went into details about M’s strict ban on television and also reveals that the ban extends to newspapers. The kids all follow a strict macrobiotic-kosher diet and are banned from McDonald’s. That fucking sucks. Those kids are going to grow up with sticks in their asses. That or someone is going to introduce them into the world of fast food and those bitches are gonna put on an easy 15.
-C
YAHOO
Apr
13
2009
Okay, bear with me on this crap. Last week, it was said that Madonna will be building a home for herself in Malawi in order to somehow change the mind of the judge that basically told her to fuck off without a kid two weeks ago. She’s decided to build a house next to her already planned all-girls school there. Did she not learn anything from Oprah?
Apparently her recent visit to Malawi wasn’t only to steal a kid, but she was also there to oversee construction of her school and she also told her architect to draw up plans for a house. The Sun says:
“Madonna has a big, beautiful plot of land over there already. She’s planning to build a girl’s school in the Chinkhota village and those designs are well under way. But she’s gone back to the designers and asked if they could accommodate a family home on the plot or on adjacent land.”
The villagers are still apparently pissed because Madge has yet to compensate them so I bet those fuckers put some voo doo Poltergeist shit on the land. In other news, in a last minute attempt to rally the people of Malawi against the denial of her adoption, the usually private Madonna allowed Malawian newspaper, Nation, to interview about the tug-of-war situation. Madonna explains her desires for baby Mercy James if she were able to live with her:
“I want to provide Mercy with a home, a loving family environment and the best education and healthcare possible…And it’s my hope that she, like David, will one day return to Malawi and help the people of their country.”
She couldn’t reveal much regarding the appeal of the denial, but she did tip her hat for the Malawian people for their continued support of her adoption. Says Madonna:
“Though I have been advised that I cannot publicly discuss the pending appeal regarding my desire to adopt Mercy, I do want to say how much I appreciate the level of support that I have received from the people of Malawi and my friends around the world.”
Continue Reading »
Apr
10
2009
Buffy and that guy Freddie Prinze Jr. are popping out a kid this fall.Yay.
-C
PEOPLE
Apr
03
2009
And because she can and because she’s rich, Madonna, isn’t going down without a fight. Just after a Malawi court basically told a bitch to take a hike without a kid (four-year-old girl Mercy James), Madonna has appealed the ruling
Madge’s lawyerbitch Alan Chinula says:
“I just filed the notice of appeal this afternoon on instructions from my client.”
The judge basically acknowledged Madonna’s ability to be a great and loving mother, but refused to break the rules just because she’s a famous rich bitch. Judge says:
“It is necessary that we look beyond the petitioner … and consider the consequences of opening the doors too wide. By removing the very safeguard that is supposed to protect our children, the courts … could actually facilitate trafficking of children by some unscrupulous individuals.”
Let’s see how a bitch gets out of this one…methinks a little dong slapping, a couple thou, a promise to never make another single movie ever again, and what have you would work.
-C
Source
Apr
03
2009
How unfortunate. Maybe what Madonna wants, she doesn’t always get. In an attempt to adopt a motherless litle girl who lives in an orphanage in Malawi, a local judge basically hammered down his shizz and said Hell to the NO today.
Zione Ntaba, a spokesperson for the Malawi Justice Department said:
“The decision came down to residency requirement and the fact that the judge believes she was being well taken care of in the orphanage. For the Malawians, the fact that the child is at an orphanage, is being taken care of and is going through the school education system, that does qualify as the best interests of a child.”
Odd since Madonna was able to get David Banda without having residency last time around. They made an exception for her then, but why not now? It’s unclear as to why the judge ruled differently, but another judge had handled Madonna’s prior adoption case.
And riddle me this, but a kid would be provided for better in an orphanage than in a huge ass mansion, with siblings, a mother, and a shit load of money? Sans flies buzzing around its head? Madonna has the opportunity to appeal today’s ruling to Malawi’s Supreme Court if she decides to. Listen, I love to poke fun at Madge, but in the end this BIA is going to be able to provide for any kid more than an orphanage can.
-C
Apr
03
2009
So Madonna threw on the fake happy face and took her adopted son, David, to meet with his biological papa, Yohane Banda. Unfortunately, the kid’s been wrapped up in so much Madge shit from divorce to ritual sucking of the virgin souls to keep young that the kid didn’t know who the fuck he was.
They spent about three hours together…first time since 2006. Really great that Madonna takes every opportunity she gets to bring him back to hang with his dad. Bitch has more than enough money to make it happen. I want a divorce from Guy right now! Okay here’s $20 mil! I want 50 botox injections! Here’s hundreds of thousands of dollars. I want to work out with my best friend Gwyneth Boringtrow with our overly priced trainer! You get the point. Whatever.
The father was obviously stunned that the boy did not remember him and also could not speak his native tongue. What? Madonna couldn’t get one of her precious slaves to fetch a few fucking picture? Yohane said:
He asked me in English who I was and what I do. When I told him, ‘I am your daddy’ he looked surprised. We spent three hours together… he played with my nose and although he did not know who I was he asked me lots of questions.
“David is quite chatty and intelligent. He asked whether I ride horses but I told him horses are for the rich. He asked me why I am poor. He said his mum likes riding horses and told me that one day he and his brother, Rocco, rode horses and fell. He said his mum spanked him because they are not supposed to ride on their own.”
Madonna’s a CHILD BEATER!!!! What a fuck!!!! That’s probably because she put her God damn Swept Away movie on and David covered his eyes in sheer embarassment. Also, David’s a little brat! Asking his dad why he’s rich? I’m surprised he didn’t sashay his head and say “Girrrrl I’m used to the fin-uh things in life! I ride horses to Mummy & Daddy’sWhoever She’s Currently Banging’s room!” David also told Yohane he misses his nanny, who quit or was fired by Madonna–whatever:
“He misses her a lot because she used to read him books. Nowadays he has different nannies and he doesn’t like the situation.”
God forbid Madonna actually takes care of the kids she purchases or lifts a finger to read a book. She has about three other nannies on call to do such things. The little boy also spoke of his relationship with Guy Ritchie:
He seems to like his daddy Mr. Ritchie so much,” said Yohana. “I was a sad Madonna broke up with him. I would have loved it if they sorted out whatever problems they had instead of divorcing because divorce is bad for kids.”
Well, Yohana, you know how she spanks your kid? She used to man handle Ritchie on a fucking daily basis. What a total steroid mess.
-C
Source
Apr
01
2009
There’s a few things you don’t do to a woman. A) You don’t steal her man especially while she’s pregnant B) You don’t go and brag about your relationship with that guy and C) You never say you treat her child as if they were your own and D) You don’t call their kid an IT.
Unfortunately, Gisele Bundchen has done all of these things to Big’s Natasha aka Bridget Moynahan. In the latest issue of Vanity Fair, the supermodel now turned official ’stepmom’ spoke about Jack, the baby her current husband Tom Brady and his ex-Bridget had together. What did she say you ask? If you need refreshing:
“I understand that he has a mom, and I respect that, but to me it’s not like because somebody else delivered him, that’s not my child. I feel it is, 100 percent. I want him to have a great relationship with his mom, because that’s important, but I love him the same way as if he were mine.”
DUN DUN DUN!!! Needless to say, Moynahan’s camp are on attack…actually quite fuming over the model’s statements on behalf of their friend who has decided to keep her mouth shut about the issue. A friend of Bridget’s says:
“Hey Gisele — real mothers don’t call their kids ‘it.’”
Continues the friend:
“If Tom is such a great father as everyone likes to say, then you would think that he’d respect the privacy of his young child and would ask his wife not to use his son as a publicity prop and a subject of public discussion.”
BURRRRRRRRN! Gisele is about as smart as box of crayola crayons so I’m going to assume she didn’t mean to state what she said, but I could totally imagine Bridget beating the fuck out of her if it came down to it. Unfortunately, I’m more like her friend with a big mouth ready to brawl…Bridget needs some fucking adrenaline boosting because I want to see a full on cat fight…I’m sure most guys do, too, but I want it merely for talking shit purposes…not to jack off.
-C
Mar
30
2009
Madonna needs to relax, take a pill, and fucking sleep to fix her zombie like face for a few days. Maybe take a vacation from saving Africa since bitch basically thinks she owns it. She also needs to set her daughter, Lola, up for an eyebrow waxing as soon as possible. She arrived in Africa this weekend, you know, to open up her net and catch another kid.
Unfortunately, bitch isn’t getting away so easily with snatching up a kid. Madge will have to show her face in a court in Malawi today to make the final payment on her new kid, Mercy James. However, the BIA’s mom mom isn’t going down without a fight…she’s trying to stop the adoption.
Lucy Chekechiwa who is the mother of three-year-old Mercy is telling papers that the Vadgesty is nothing more than a baby snatcher. She might have a case since I’m sure Baby Jesus Luz’s mother will sign on to that. Lucy said she made an agreement with the orphanage Lucy is shacking up with at then when the kid turned six, she’d come back home. Last time I read I though this kid’s parents were dead? I’m so confused. Lucy went on to say:
“Why doesn’t this singer pick other children? It is stealing. I want to go to court, I won’t let her go.”
Give. me. a. break. All Madonna has to do is whip out a nice wad of cash money, throw it in Lucy’s hands, and give her the death stare. Instant success. Not only is Lucy bothered by Madonna’s entry into Africa, but apparently some villagers are pissed she’s building a girls’ school around their areas. Girls school my ass. You know that shit is there for whenever Madonna wants to come back and baby snatch a new find.
Villagers are saying that they have been told many of their homes and gardens will be torn down in order for the school to exist. A government official said the villagers would be compensated by the singer’s foundation. When a journalist asked the singer if she was worried about all of this, she responded “NO!!!” and that’s because Madonna knows that with an icy stare or the snap of her fingers, everything will go her way regardless of the many African villagers who will be homeless, but don’t worry! Madonna is trying to SAVE AFRICA…so this makes sense…ruining the homes and gardens of those who, uh, live there.
-C
Source & Source
Mar
26
2009
Madonna could request Nelson Mandela to beg at her feet and feed her strawberries with his nipples and bitch would somehow get it. So this doesn’t really surprise me that she’s going to be able to adopt again. Eh forget the strawberries, Madonna doesn’t eat.
Well, I reported a week or two ago that Madge was looking to adopt from Malawi again. It looks finalized because she filed adoption papers and will travel there this weekend to find her next Messiah. So kids of Malawi: FUCKING RUN or you, too, will have a Mommy Dearest of your own.
Rumor mill is spilling and it looks as though Madge wants to adopt a little chick this time around. You know if Jesus has to battle for her affection with a new guy in town, things will likely become bitter between the two.
-C
Source
Mar
20
2009
Aubrey O’Day is that delusional girl we all knew in high school. The one who strived for attention and latched on to the cool kids to gain some notoriety. You always felt bad for this girl so you kept her around mainly to make fun of her behind her back and laugh at her expense. Yes, you did so don’t call me a bitch…think about it. She was the friend that nobody liked. Everyone has one. I’ll keep mine mum.
She’s delusional so much so that she hopes to be the godmother of Jenna Jameson’s new twin boys. Honestly I wouldn’t put it past Jenna who more than likely would love to have a ho for a godmother. If Jenna passes away, at least she’ll rest easy knowing her sons are about to go into the arms of super skank. O’Day tells OK! magazine that she was the first person Jenna told about the pregnancy:
“She was like, ‘I just want you to know, my best friend, that I’m pregnant. Tito and I are expecting.’”
Oh she doesn’t stop there. We all should be lucky enough to have someone like Aubrey O’Day take on the role of godmother. She continues:
“Hell yeah! I’m going to be the one who stands next to Jen and buys the babies everything.”
Really Aubrey? With what money? You know Playboy paid your ass entry level so that check should be a runnin’ out soon. The most I’d ever let Aubrey do for my kids would be to wait on them hand and foot because you know bitch was made to maid that or entertain my boys when they turn 18 at the strip club.
-C
Source
