blondieenyc

Joe Francis has that face you just want to punch.  Mainly because he got rich and famous for filming underage boobies (Girls Gone Stupid Wild)and what have you, but also that he looks like a more ridiculous version of Tony Danza.  Anyway, after showing up five hours late to a preliminary court hearing, Mr. Francis was arrested.

As you all know by reading my blog yesterday, the district judge issued a warrant for his arrest when Francis failed to appear on time.  And when you look like a dumbass, you usually sound like one, too.  That usually goes with the territory.  The dumbass claims he was late because he had “the flu.” Judge Otero a hot ass because he didn’t give a fuck and sent his ass off to the chokey.

Francis is accused of failing to pay taxes on more than $20 million in business expenses.  If convicted, he could face up to ten years in prison and ten years of dicks in his no no hole. He’ll find out if he’ll have a nice long jail time of peen in March.  The hearing yesterday, Monday, was scheduled at his law firm’s request to be removed as Francis’ legal counsel in the case.  Well that basically sucks.  Usually when your client has a thing for little nippies on 16-year-olds…I’d say that’s not the best way to represent your company.

-C

I’m pretty sure Joe Francis was just in jail, but whatever.  There’s a warrant out for the the creator of the stupid shit Girls Gone Wild.  After the mo failed to show up for a Los Angeles court hearing in his tax evasion case, a bench warrant was issued.

A U.S. attorney’s spokesman said the warrant was issued by a U.S. District judge.  The douchebagouch plead not guilty to two counts of federal tax evasion.  He’s accused of claiming more than $20 mil in fake business expenses on his corporate tax returns.

Maybe they should also consider suing his ass for having 16 and 17-year-old chicks taking their tops off for old men who are the only ones who buy this shit.  I saw that crap one night in Missouri (yes, I was in Missouri) and I didn’t get it.  I could just look down my own shirt and know I’ve got game on the rest of those bitties.

-C

I’m 100% serious with that headline.  Both Joe Francis and Larry Flynt cite a recession-inducing downturn in adult entertainment sales and believe the government should give them a $5 million bailout.  Because you know fake titties, stretched out v’s, and peenies are a few of the most important things to worry about in the morning.  We’re all basically poor, but give the boozed up underage girls some cashhhh money.

Flynt explains:

“With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind. It’s time for Congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America.”

Because when you’re losing money, even jacking off is in the back of your head.  Trust me.  I’ve lessened the touch me sessions drastically.  Francis says:

“Congress seems willing to help shore up our nation’s most important businesses; we feel we deserve the same consideration.”

You know I’d go out on a limb here and say that Congress is more than likely not going to give money to a recent ex-con to fly down to Cancun and get 17-year-old drunken boozed up ho’s to show their tata’s.  I also don’t think giving money to a fat perverted man who has a dick up a v 24 hours a day is going to fix many of the economic issues at hand.  Now if Elliot Spitzer or Bill Clinton’s Lewinsky days were heading this shit, then I’d reconsider. J, don’t be sad…porn’s not going away 

Class and Trash with an Edge of sASS*-Cw